These issues have been turning around in my head for quite a time now. The time has come to share them with you good people...
Sex is a risky behavior. This seems self-evident, but it seems that most people pay lip service to this truism but don't believe in it for a second. Why is this?
Sex introduces emotional and mental involvement with such confounding and potentially dangerous concepts as love, commitment and trust. So why is it that people allow this quite risky behavior to rule their minds and actions and possibly ruin them?
It is said by psychologist and anthropologist alike that sex and the desire for it are uncontrollable "animal" instincts, inborn and as essential, in some ways, as food and shelter. This approach to the subject could not be more misguided.
Sex needs to be viewed rationally. How is this possible? When sex (a series of pleasant physical and sensory stimuli) can have wide reaching effects (deadly disease, unwanted pregnancy, mental anguish, social compulsion, alienation and a host of other pathologies) not only on one's self but on countless others, emotion must be set aside and reason be allowed to take control.
Sex must be understood for what it is and be exposed to a "risk management analysis" or "cost/benefit analysis." One must ask "what do I stand to gain and what is possibly at stake here?" Or, to put it in my father's words "is the screwing you get worth the screwing you take?"
With all of the physical and mental risks involved, I cannot see many situations where the answer would come back "yes, this is a good idea; let's do it (so to speak)."
I realize that these ideas will incur some criticism. Central among these will be those who say that I am just a bitter, loveless person who would think differently if I was "getting some." To this I say that any idiot with a basic strategy and the impetus to do so can initiate sexual congress. Not everyone so inclined, however, realizes the full implications of their actions. As I said, in most cases, the negatives outweigh the positives.
Others may say that I am just another religious zealot, against birth control and preaching celibacy apart from for married men and women for reproduction. First off, I am not a religious zealot: I believe in the right of all people to engage in whatever behavior they choose as long as it dosen't injure others. Have as much sex as you want with as many people as you want.
Just realize that your behaviors have consequences THAT YOU AND YOU ALONE MUST DEAL WITH! Do not expect that your family/government/community/religious institution/friends will do anything for you. It was you that made this decision; you figure out how to deal with it. Go to your family and friends; if they like you and pity you, you will find succor. The government (the representative of everyone else) should be left out of the equation. I do not pay exorbident taxes to support the fruits of your bad decisions, nor should I have to listen to your constant whining about how sexual dalliance has overtaken all of your energies. Keep it to yourself.
Is this cruel? Maybe it is and, frankly, I couldn't care less. I have made bad mistakes in the past and found non-invasive ways to deal with them. I suggest that all of you do likewise.
Freedom is a wonderful thing and the highest aspiration of all humankind. Don't forget this because you cannot control your purile urges. Be a better person than that and the world will be a far better place for all of us.
TOMORROW: If you must have sex, let's change some laws and customs first. Love, rationality and responsibility - The Cold Sting of Morning.
"Check the Box Sunday"
5 weeks ago